How to get closer to finding what you want to do with your life
I had a conversation with my brother today as we chatted about what we should be doing with our lives. We have this conversation often, but today as I drove home reflecting on what we had discussed I realised something central about how I have figured out where I’m going next.
In our conversation my brother was trying to convince me that I should be focussing on ideas and solutions that involve robotics and the associated technology since he feels this will be the next big focus in our lifetime.
I could understand where he was coming from but this idea didn’t spark my interest at all. I don’t have the same curiosity and passion for technology and inventions as he does. My interests lie in the human condition and our evolution both individually and as a species. I told him that I’m more interested in discovering solutions to bringing all humans to a similar level of intelligence and enlightened consciousness. He thought I was thinking about the key to the future from the completely wrong angle.
On the drive home I realised that my brother’s interests and passions are very much inspired by the people in history (and in the now) that fascinate and impress him the most. Ever since he was little he’s been fascinated by famous inventors and scientists and even went to a school fancy dress event dressed as Doc Brown from Back To The Future. It’s the life stories of these people he admires – how they came to be who they are, how they live their lives, how they think and how they were often able to discover amazing inventions without the sort of education or training we would think necessary today – that has spurred him on to think about life and what he wants to achieve.
I don’t have a personal history of admiring certain types of people and their stories since I was very young, but in more recent years my interest in the life stories and contributions of certain individuals or types of individuals has been consuming. I can’t seem to get enough of discovering how those I admire came to be who they are and came to have their influence on the world.
When I look at these individuals they tend to fall into at least one of the following categories: feminist, atheist, social commentator, personal/spiritual development advisor/inspirer, historical novelist, entrepreneur. What they have in common above all is that they are all writers with large followings. Their ideas and thoughts inspire and inform others and they are greatly valued for the contribution of their ideas.
As I drove home today wondering whether I really should be turning my focus more towards science and its applications I quickly realised that no, that wasn’t for me. What I want is to be like those I most admire. I want to be a prolific writer, whose ideas and contributions help inspire and inform the choices of my readers throughout their lives. In this way I think I will be able to contribute to the development of humanity, even if only through a small handful of people.
You can achieve this same understanding by thinking carefully about those people who most inspire you and spark your intense curiosity. Whose lives interest you most? Who do you most find yourself wanting to be like and why? Whose status updates or tweets can you not get enough of? Whose blog posts do you wait for eagerly? Whose biography can you not wait to read? Who have you read about most recently on Wikipedia?
Investigate this and you will be one huge step closer to figuring out what you want to do with your life and what sort of person you want to be. If you study those that inspire you closely, you’ll also figure out a few different strategies about how you can achieve your dreams.
I’d love to hear what you think about this strategy and whether it will hold much merit for you in your search.
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13 comments
Hey Mirella!
Another thoughtful essay (notice I did not say “post”. Just a side note, really, but I think once we start thinking of what we publish as essays rather than posts, we start to take it more seriously ourselves.) I agree. This is a fantastic way to adjust your focus: think of the people you admire most, better yet choose just a few or even one above all, and make the decision to emulate their model and work in their tradition. For me, Rod Serling would be right up there!
Best,
Peter
Thanks Peter
It’s funny you say that about the essay concept – as I was describing the traits of the people I most admire I realised that I had left out essayist and had chosen to use writer instead to leave it open more broadly, but those whose writing I tend to admire have been both essayists and also writers of another style also. And you’re right, having the right perception of what you’re doing is important to the fruition of your dreams.
I am not familiar with Rod Serling but you can be sure I’ll be reading up on him today!
Thanks as always for your support
Where the people you admire writers first, visionaries/creators/entrepreneurs second; or vice-versa?
Hi Mirella,
I have really enjoyed reading your blog thus far having an interest in philosophy etc myself. I like the way you have posed the question as who you want to be rather than what you want to be. I feel there is an important difference here as often people get caught up in what job they would want to do and overidentify with the role. It is sad that the most commonly asked question at a party for example is ‘what do you do’ as if we are all defined as people by this.
I also think a lot of people have guilt associated with thinking about what they may want to do with their lives, as if it is a lofty question that only other people should consider. At times it seems as though people almost need permission from those around them to persue something which should really be at the heart of our lives.
I think your idea is good for narrowing the focus and avoiding the difficulties associated with too much choice. I wonder if you have read the book ‘What should I do with my life’ by Po Bronson. I recommend it highly. You may like it as he interviews many people from different walks of life who have attempted to answer the question, with mixed results.
Phil
Dear Mirella, I do hope you pursue being an essayist as at least one of your dreams. Your pieces always strike at my soul and I can honestly say that of all the blogs I read yours are the ones I find the most inspiring. I guess because they don’t preach or try to sell me something or rehash other people’s ideas, but are an invitation to explore along with you. Your writing is lucid and unselfconscious even as you are investigating yourself. You have my greatest admiration.
Like this essay as well. Waiting for more on your progress. Maybe you’ll be giving the rest of us some hope that we could reach our destiny, or reasons to exist. I’ll try right now thinking about it, hope you’re right.
Hi Phil,
Thanks so much for your comments. Thanks also for the recommendation for the Po Bronson book – I have heard of it but have never read it but think I would really enjoy and get a lot out of it. Yet another book to add to my every increasing reading list.
Thanks again
Shirls thank you so much for your lovely comments and for your support, it certainly made my day and I think about these words often.
I am starting up a new project very soon and hope that you’ll enjoy my work there often. All will be revealed soon!
Ibrahim, I’m a bout to launch a new site with a slightly different focus and plan so you may be able to watch me reveal my every evolving path there. All will be revealed soon!
The things I most wikpedia are folk lore/legend, historical figures, quotes from poetry, spiritual movements, healers and spiritual figures. I have such an interest in the old and the concepts of peoples beliefs, I find it fascinating. Do you think this interest is something I could take further? Into a career maybe?
I feel like there is no “connectedness” amongst my interests/abilities
I would say I am medium high in the following areas
cooking/baking
cleaning/organizing
decorating/planning
caretaking/seniors and children
I have acquired most of these skills from years as a homemaker and while working
clerical/administrative
time management/efficiency
health and safety/labor/human resources
I love to write(in my head:)/observe/hypothesize
I love to learn/read – documentaries excite me!
biology/ science/medecine/brain study. fascinate me and I can read and understand/research legal documents reasonably well
sooooo. ya. I have recently started searching my heart and breathing again to feel instead of think. it calms me and refocuses my perspective. I take it less seriously now. however it is frustrating as I would be happy working in any one of those fields but have acquired most of this knowledge informally. without degrees. anyway…I digress
thank you for your essay
. it was beautiful
Thanks for sharing Milly, I think you’ve helped give others insight.
I share your interests (we may be kindred spirits!) and for me I’ve decided that until I am deeper into my own spirituality and personal growth, I wouldn’t know how to share completely with others or turn it into a career. But I’m still thinking on it and you should too, you never know what sort of insight and direction you might find.
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